i should have been asleep hours ago because i’m so exhausted, i don’t remember what it is not to be tired, not to try and sleep with these shaking, aching bones. everybody just knows i will always be there, that i will never leave, that i am a constant, but nobody wants to be here for me in the same way. nobody wants to remind me that i’m doing okay and that they’ve noticed how hard i’ve been trying and how worried i am about getting in trouble by something or someone and i don’t even know who or what but it torments my mind. my skin is dry and sore it burns when i am stressed, and i rub so hard sometimes i wish i could just block an artery for a moment, have a rest for a moment
